How can newlyweds achieve harmony and avoid conflict? | Safe and Sound
Newlywed couples often face many challenges in adjusting to life together and dealing with personal differences. Conflicts can frequently occur during this period, causing stress for both partners. So how can newlyweds get along and avoid unnecessary conflicts? In this article, Safe and Sound's psychology experts will share some tips to help young couples build a strong relationship right from the start of their life together.
Ngo Thi Sang | Master of Educational Psychology – Applied to Safe and Sound Mental Health Care
Institute of Applied Medical Technology
1. Sincere and effective communication
Sincere and effective communication
Communication is the most important factor in maintaining a harmonious marriage. Psychologists say that to avoid unnecessary conflicts, newlywed couples need to:
- Listen and understand each other.
Listen to your partner with genuine care and understanding. Don't just listen to react, but listen to understand your partner's feelings and thoughts. According to psychologists, this empathetic approach will help both of you avoid misunderstandings and unnecessary stress.
- Express your emotions sincerely.
Instead of bottled up frustrations, psychologists suggest couples express their feelings honestly and appropriately. Emotional transparency helps your partner understand you better, and conversely, avoids the "cold war" or underlying conflicts.
- Communicate not only through words.
Beyond words, communication is also expressed through actions, eye contact, and gestures. A hug, a smile, or a handshake is enough to convey a message of love, help dispel misunderstandings, and reduce stress.
2. Respect differences
When living together, two people will realize many differences, from daily habits to life perspectives. Psychologists emphasize that respecting these differences is key to helping newlyweds avoid conflict.
- Understand that each person is a unique individual.
Even after marriage, each person retains their own individual values. Don't try to change your partner to fit your own style; instead, respect and accept each other's differences.
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- Compromise and find common ground
In a shared life, there will be times when you have to compromise to maintain harmony. Psychologists advise discussing and finding solutions that both partners can accept. Finding common ground will help you both feel better and overcome obstacles more easily.
3. Give each other personal time and opportunities for self-development.
Give each other some private time and opportunities for personal growth.
Even after marriage, maintaining personal space and independence is crucial to avoid feelings of suffocation in the marriage.
- Respect each other's time and personal preferences.
Don't forget that everyone has their own hobbies, friends, and personal time they want to dedicate to themselves. Respecting each other's personal time will help both of you feel more relaxed and reduce stress.
- Encourage the other person to pursue their own passions.
Psychologists encourage couples to encourage each other to continue pursuing their personal passions. This support not only shows love but also helps both partners feel freer and happier in their marriage.
4. Develop the habit of resolving conflicts in a positive way.
Conflict is inevitable in marriage, but how you resolve it is what truly matters. To avoid hurting each other, newlyweds need to:
- Solve the problem instead of arguing.
When conflicts arise, psychologists advise couples to focus on finding solutions rather than blaming or arguing with each other. This will help you resolve issues constructively and avoid unnecessary hurt feelings.
- Avoid conflict when you are stressed.
Sometimes, discussing things when both of you are stressed will only make the situation worse. Take a break and give both of you time to calm down before continuing the discussion.
- Learn how to apologize and forgive.
No one is perfect, and sometimes we can make mistakes. Psychologists say that knowing when to apologize and being willing to forgive will help strengthen your marriage.
5. Share responsibilities and household chores.
Sharing responsibilities and household chores
One of the causes of conflict in marriage is the unequal division of household chores. To maintain harmony, both partners need to:
- Divide the work fairly.
Let's discuss and divide household chores fairly, based on each person's abilities and available time. This will help avoid one person being burdened with too much responsibility, leading to stress and conflict.
- Supporting each other in times of difficulty
Marriage is not just about sharing joys, but also about supporting each other during difficult times. Psychologists encourage you to be ready to help your partner when they are stressed, facing difficulties at work, or in life.
- Expressing gratitude and acknowledging the other person's contributions.
Occasionally expressing gratitude and acknowledging the other person's contributions will strengthen the relationship and make it happier. A sincere compliment or thank you can dispel fatigue and stress.
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